Dondi Scumaci Blog

I was stunned recently when a long-time client called to say, “Our team is not functioning well. We need help…soon.”

While it’s not uncommon to hear a team is struggling to be effective, it was a huge surprise with this particular group. I’d been working with them for many years and had always known them to be nothing short of high performing. It was hard for me to imagine them in a “dysfunctional” place.

When I arrived a few days later, my plan was more about discovering the issues than “fixing” the people. I truly wanted to understand what was causing a mature, productive team to unravel at their virtual seams. We began the process by exploring the flow or  “current,” with a deeper dive to confront the undertows. What exactly was dragging this team under?

When I asked team members to describe their “current reality,” the answers were fascinating. They used words like ragged, stressed and overwhelmed.  Tensions were running high and hot. People were feeling defensive and reactive.

Rapid even relentless change was a major theme in our discussion. For months the company had been reaching for ways to become more efficient and competitive.  Resources were limited and goals were aggressive. Everyone was being stretched…too the limit.

My first impression was “change fatigue.” The group obviously needed a moment to stabilize before tackling the next initiative, but there was more to uncover. The symptoms and causes were morphing into a new (and very dysfunctional) brand.

Conflict had become a real threat. Where they had once enjoyed productive and constructive dialogue, they were now sniping at and about each other.  Pseudo teams had formed and clichés had emerged. Clearly the established ground rules and communication agreements had been thrown overboard.  (As we worked to diagnose the problem a hospital metaphor popped into my head. If trust were a “patient” in this place she’d be in on life support.)

This team had slipped a gear, and these new patterns of behavior were chipping away at the culture. The rapid decline was astonishing! And there was definite fallout: a top producer had just resigned and another was actively seeking a new opportunity.  Good people were leaving for all the wrong reasons.

What may have been most telling happened when I asked the group to share recent accomplishments and breakthroughs. The room fell silent.  These fabulous people were struggling to recall a success!

They had become so focused on the deadlines and next steps they completely lost sight of how far they had come or how they’d grown.  That’s like climbing a mountain without ever stopping to admire the view.

Then it struck me. This team had not forgotten how to be a team; they had forgotten to value the process and recognize the progress. The constant emphasis was on “”what’s next.”

That’s an exhausting way to work (or live)! We absolutely must sense our progress. It is to be noted and celebrated and…studied. This is so important because our past achievements light the path for the next success.

A meeting that can help your team make that shift is called “Appreciative Inquiry” and it works like this:

1. Ask your team to think about a time when it overcame an obstacle, seized an opportunity, achieved a goal, or solved a problem.

2. As your team reflects on this achievement, ask questions to draw out the specifics attitudes, skills and behaviors they used to navigate the challenge. For example:

• What made us so successful in this situation?
• What challenges did we face?
• How did we overcome those challenges?
• What did we learn along the way?
• What skills did we use?
• What did we believe about this challenge?
• How were those beliefs reflected in our behaviors?
• How did we honor each other through the process?
• How did we each contribute?
• How did we grow as individuals and as a team?
• What did we “add” to ourselves?

3. Capture the answers and insights so they are visible to the group. You are writing a success story here; the authors of that story need to see it clearly!

4. Once you have explored the success thoroughly, ask your team how it can apply these skills, beliefs and behaviors to create a new break through. How can you intentionally use these attributes to navigate the current reality?

This exercise looks for the best in people and processes. It encourages teams (at work and at home) to diagnose success and focus on what works.  In a season of frustration or weariness, Appreciative Inquiry turns the focus from “what is wrong” to “who we are” and “what we can do.”

I used Appreciate Inquiry to draw success out of this struggling team. It was amazing to watch the transformation as they reflected on the history of their own success. It was a David and Goliath moment!

They re-engaged with the mission and each other. They laughed (and cried) as they told the stories. They filled eleven flipchart pages with the attributes and attitudes of success!

It turns out they weren’t dysfunctional after all. They just needed to remember who they are, what they are capable of, and what it feels like to win…again. It was an honor and pleasure to remind them.

If you’ve been following this 3-part series, Meetings that Can Change Everything, you’ve learned that:

1. Victory Meetings help us energize and celebrate. They increase our appetite for winning and give us the opportunity to cheer others on. Victory Meetings encourage the heart, build confidence and renew our strength.
2. Extreme Focus Meetings invite involvement and collaboration. This is important because for people to be authentically engaged, they must be authentically involved. Use Extreme Focus Meetings to develop ownership and commitment, solve problems, and improve processes.
3. Appreciative Inquiry diagnoses our success and teaches us to do more of what works…intentionally. It helps us value the process, recognize the progress and leverage our strengths.

We would love to hear how you apply these meeting tactics with your teams at work and at home. You are invited to share your experiences and successes with us here and with our Facebook community at Dondi Scumaci’s author page.

Have you ever purchased a car, left the lot and suddenly noticed all the cars on the road just like yours? Do you think they weren’t there before?  (It’s almost as if they’ve appeared out of nowhere–released into the car wild, right after your purchase.)

Of course those cars were always there. If you didn’t see them, it simply means you weren’t looking for them.

You can experiment with this concept right where you are: Look around yourself for a few seconds. (Go ahead swivel all the way around. Stand up if you must to get a better view.)

Once you have done that – look again. This time look for everything that is red.

Chances are (if you’re playing along) reds are popping out all around you. Who knew there was so much red! It isn’t magic, it is attention. What you look for, you notice. What you search for (even subconsciously), you see.

Your brain really is amazing. Constantly bombarded by impressions clamoring for your attention, it has a fantastic filtering feature. Now here’s the best part: You can use those filters intentionally – to solve problems and seize opportunities.  Like a guided missal, you can send your brain (and your team) on a mission. You can create a lazar focus to search for and find your “reds” and “cars.”

Think about it for a moment. What are the reds and cars in your environment? What should you and your team be looking for and noticing? Perhaps it is an opportunity to lower costs or improve service; maybe it is catching what is falling through the cracks or what is taking too long. Your “reds” and “cars” might be ideas to build a stronger, more resilient team, communicate more effectively, or handle conflict more productively.

This entire car-shopping-red-seeking discussion leads to a powerful teaming and meeting tool. We can create extreme focus around what we are looking for, working on and trying to solve – with a single question.

I like the idea of using questions instead of answers to create extreme focus. Questions inspire involvement and involvement is the fast track to ownership and commitment. As Zig Ziglar is famous for saying, “People act best on their own ideas.” (I’ve also heard they don’t argue with their own data.)

Questions push back on the crush of mandates and demands. Sometimes I think there is way too much “telling” going on in the world. Managers and team leaders can get caught in that trap. Parents can too.

We can get so good at telling; we might forget a simple concept: People need to be honestly involved to be authentically engaged.

Here’s another reason to ask rather than tell. The answers might just amaze you. Others will see things you don’t. They will bring new perspectives and insights. Something else will happen too: Well-posed questions are like a compass – steering people towards their “North” – to the future and solutions. That’s energizing!

What are the questions you will ask yourself, your team, or even one member of your team to create extreme focus around performance, results and solutions? As a manager, you might find your questions inside of a performance problem. Here’s a thought: Instead of telling in that performance situation, try asking employees the questions you wish they were asking of themselves.

As you explore this concept, you will find questions invite creativity and accountability. They help people focus on what they can influence or control. Instead of complaining about the problem, they are searching for the solution. That’s powerful because the brain really is amazing; if you give it a problem to solve – a question to answer, it goes to work. Suddenly we are noticing what we did not see – solutions, options and answers.

If you decide to hold an Extreme Focus Meeting of your own, here are the steps:

1. Choose a problem or an opportunity your group (or family) is facing and turn it into a question. For example, if the opportunity is to improve customer service, you might ask: “What could we do to make it easier for our customers to do business with us?”
2. Gather your team for a moment and pose the question. It’s important to personalize this challenge. (The question isn’t, “What can the company do or what should management do – it is what can you do – what can we do?”)
3. Let the team know you will meet again this afternoon, tomorrow, or next week.  Between now and then, the assignment is clear: Bring at least one solution, idea or commitment with you when you return.
4. Meet at the appointed time and collect the ideas and commitments. Encourage people to explore and experiment with their solutions.
5. Recognize and reward people as they follow through. Make progress visible and celebrate the victories.

Don’t be alarmed if your first meetings fail to yield brilliant, captivating ideas. Keep asking! Over time, the quality and quantity of ideas will grow. Confidence, energy and commitment will also rise.

In the end, you may find what I discovered. Getting to the answer or solution is a good thing.  How you get there matters too. Actually, how you get there may be what people will remember the most.

In Part III we’ll talk about another meeting that can change everything. Until then, I wish you all the best as you search for and find your “reds” and “cars.”

I’ve had several people tell me they have never been invited to a victory meeting. Consider yourself invited. Click here to join the victory meeting on Friday. Hope to see you there.

Most of us can probably relate to meeting “overload.” One study suggests that managers spend 30% – 40% of their time in meetings! Even more staggering is the fact that much of that meeting time is considered a total waste of time.

Still, there are meetings that will make a difference. I believe there are three meetings that can change everything – focus, momentum, expectations, and results. In a series of three articles, you will have the opportunity to consider the difference these meetings can make for you and your teams. We’ll start with the “Victory Meeting.”

Victory Meetings have been going on in my house for almost twenty years. My son grew up on these Friday evening rallies – for him they are the norm. Fridays just wouldn’t be Fridays in our family without a Victory Meeting.  Of course that hasn’t always been true. I can still remember our first few (mildly embarrassing) attempts.

At my insistence, we had gathered at the refrigerator to declare our successes for the week. To say my son wasn’t fully onboard would be an understatement. “This is so dumb,” he said.

I replied, “Dumb or not, every Friday we will meet here with a list of our achievements and victories for the week. We will celebrate them properly by posting them on the refrigerator. We will then whistle and cheer and clap. The dogs will bark and the neighbors will wish they lived in this happy, happy house filled to the brim with victory. Any questions?”

I can still see his eyes rolling, but he humored me.  So our tradition began. Every Friday evening you would find us at the refrigerator, faithfully reciting our achievements and cheering for each one.

It was a wonderful moment when I realized the Victory Meetings were no longer a “motivational Mom’s requirement.” They had become something more. We looked forward to them; no matter how tough the week or hard the road, we honored our victories by sharing and celebrating them.

Something else happened too. Something profound. The victories became the focus of our conversations and expectations. When we looked at each other we saw winners. We noticed what was right and good and strong about each other.  (That’s powerful, because whatever we look for in each other we certainly will find.)

As the years passed and our schedules became more complicated, we had to get a little creative. A telephone was installed next to the refrigerator in case someone had to take the meeting by phone.  More than once I found myself cheering from an airport or a hotel. Somehow the victory meetings were even more important from the road; this was a standing appointment that connected us to our goals and aspirations and to each other.

Now my son is all grown up (with a refrigerator of his own) and he still he phones on Friday evenings with a list of victories. Apparently, until he has a “team” of his own, he plans on keeping this appointment. That’s just fine with me!

I’ve presented this tool to thousands of people over the years; it’s always a favorite. It’s also free. It’s simple and costs nothing to implement. These meetings are a success strategy for work teams and family teams. I highly recommend them.

And the testimonies keep coming. I hear about work teams that are more engaged and cohesive. I hear success stories about family teams too. (Many of them started just like we did with much rolling of the eyes.)

Just last week I received an email from someone who attended a workshop many years ago. She took the victory meeting to heart; then she took it home. Faithfully her family has gathered every week for the Victory Meeting. It’s a tradition that encourages the heart, builds the team, and refreshes the spirit.

Next time we’ll talk about Extreme Focus Meetings. Until then, here’s to the victories you will bring to the refrigerators of your life!